The ups and downs

Today was a good day.

As our friend Brian says as his wife - and a close friend of ours for years - recovers from a major medical crisis, you take the good days as a step toward recovery and the bad days as the price you pay for a good one.

Yesterday, Steve was depressed - badly. I was almost going to say despondent but thought that might be too strong a word. But it's only a shade too strong. He felt useless, tired, cut up, damaged, weak and helpless. He was angry. Steve's a sensitive person and he always says if he gets really angry one of two things will happen: he'll either cry or fight. Yesterday he cried.

That breaks my heart because there is nothing I can do or say to make it any better. Yes, medically we know that we are on the upswing and he's going to be fine. But it is a hard road and he is not used to being this weak and dependent. So I pretty much did the only think I could think of - and I think it was the right thing - I left him alone.

Today, our friends Kevin and Coreen came over bearing lunch and a basket of games and snacks. They stayed for a few hours: Coreen taught me how to play Cribbage and Steve and Kevin watched football. It was terrific. Steve had a good appetite and ate fried chicken, mashed potatoes, biscuits and gravy! And he sat up all the time Kevin was here, watching the game, talking, engaged and looking good.

This seemed to reinforce what I've been thinking since he got home: You feel worse when you just lay on the sofa. Interaction with people or with something - read a book, send emails, do a puzzle - makes you feel more like you are DOING SOMETHING. And that makes all the difference. He's tired now and is stretched out on the sofa watching the late game and probably going to nap a bit. But he's earned that.

Visitors make a difference, so if you're local and you're around, stop by.